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NOW PLAYING-Stuck In The Middle
Edd-Hmm...clowns to the left of me
...jokers to the right
...yes, this song IS about me!
All Eyes On Edd
Gee, you're too kind! Hello and the
warmest of welcomes to my personal
page on the GravyTrain! As you've
probably guessed, it's essence is
partially Eddy's ego and total lust
for discos, ladies and the 70s.
Here, I'm glad to say that this page
is a little more...civilised to
say the least! He's so uncouth
sometimes, it's really embarrassing!
i'm all for frivolity but he does
take
the biscuit! My apologies to
the female
members of our fanbase.
I dunno, once you
get him started
he NEVER stops!
(you got THAT right,
sockhead! ::nudge nudge:: he-he-he-he-he!)
PIC BY KITTEN
I'm sure you already know some things
about me, but even if you don't,
please sit back and read my thoughts
and
philosophies on the many things
my companions
and I have endured in
our efforts
to acquire some heavenly
candy-covered
spheres...Jawbreakers,
to the late person. Yes, the
blame
befalls Eddy for my lust
of this
certain brand of confectionary,
but
nevertheless my work is never
done
in our daily struggle towards that
ultimate
goal, and I have to say
that we've found ourselves
in some
extremely narrow scrapes along the way...
Yes, it's fair to say I take alot of
my habits and personal traits to an
extreme. But I am a firm believer
in the adage "Cleanliness is next to
Godliness"
(Hah! the guy upstairs better
watch his back then!-Eddy)
so in my
labouring to rid my environment
of
anything remotely upsetting to my immune
system
I feel a certain inner peace.
I get a shudder up my
spine when I feel
the soles of my shoe peel off Ed's basement
floor
like an old band-aid. How in the sam hill does he live that way?!?
It's disturbing!
But anyway, we'll press on before my
head
fills any further with contorted images...
PIC BY KITTEN
I guess one could say i'm the Ed behind
the scenes, the middle-man, so to speak.
But I like it this way. I suppose
Eddy's need for attention balances out
how congested
I feel in social circumstances
so interaction-wise, we complement
eachother.
Ed mainly tags along for the
ride, but he does have his good-points.
He's extremely versatile, he's like
a big chunk of plasticine.
It's actually
quite intruiging when you witness all
the many
contraptions he can be moulded
into, but it is highly
nauseating to
watch him ovicerate the streetlamps
with
his tongue, or pose as a bird-bath...
does he have any idea
where urban birds
go?!? But gag! the worst was the
time
he walked in his sleep and consumed
all the food
within a 5 block radius
of his bed...and eddy turned him into
a larder
for Eds mart to sell the kids
food back to them!
No, thank you Ed,
I think i'll pass on the milk...
Though it embarrasses me greatly to mention
this, I couldn't help but notice the
alarming amount
of fanfics that feature
me as the romantic lead...and the number
of EEnE fans who consider me...to quote Rachel...::blushing violently::"the
eye-candy of the Eds"(She's warped!
The girl's warped! Does she know a
LoveGod when she sees one?!? no-sir-ee-Bob!
I wouldn't nominate HER for
"Phone A Friend" put it THAT way!-Eddy).
With that there's something i need
to clarify;
Although, and it's excruciating to recall,
Marie Kanker was indeed my first kiss,
I don't really consider being cornered
like 3 lame ducks and batteramed with
puckered lips and Ripe Tomato Red
lipstick the pinnacal of my romantic
career, not by a long chalk. Amazingly,
I remain unswayed in my hope for
something pure and tangible with the
lady of my dreams in the
not-so-distant future. It's something
i've always longed for from an
early age, and underneath my reserved
exterior I've felt these feelings ever
on the increase(listen to him, he sounds
like he's reading the label on a kitchen
cleaner out! All this integrity's
makin' me sick!-Eddy).
But until that day, life goes on...
the wheel turns. I have theories
and physics to explore, an un-loseable
remote control to invent and a
gastronommical amount of jawbreakers
to consume with my best friends in
this adolescent amazon-Ed and Eddy.
Be sure to visit their pages, too!
I'm certain you'll find something
there that'll put a smile on your face!
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All Link-Ed Up..Edd's Fave Links! Planet Electra
Edd:The good good people of Planet Electra cyber cafe
of Liverpool have got pretty aquainted with Rach in the past
as its there where she used to get alot of her pictures
scanned until she moved to America. A brand spanking new website
with lots of info and an up-and-coming links page is underway,
so drop by and say hello...
tell 'em double dee sent ya!
GCSE SCIENCE HELP ON-LINE
Edd: On-line lessons in Biology written by
a Biology teacher (Nigel Purchon) with 31 years experience.
There are many topics in Biology covered. Site
is most useful for UK students, but of use to others also
. My, I love knowledge!
EDDY: Hey double dee...Rach only got a C in her Science GCSE y'know!
EDD: W-www-what? That's outrageous! There must be some...some...mistake,
Eddy! Please! Say it's not true!
EDD: Oh yeah...it's true! I know I would've managed
an A* in one particular area of science
....haw haw haw!!!
EDD: Yes, well we'll leave THAT to the imagination,
won't we, young man!?!
ED: Wrestling!!!GCSE Answers' Mathematics Department EDD:Tutorials, tips and advice on GCSE Mathematics for students, parents and teachers.
EDDY:Double Dee...would it scar you for life if I told you Rach only got an E in maths?
EDD: Well, yes Eddy it would...
EDDY: Good, Double dee cos she did!
EDD: Oh dear...so demure yet so...mentally stagnant, for a better word! I won't be able to sleep tonight, Eddy!
EDDY: Insomnia's been a friend of mine since I met Rach...miaow!! GCSE ANSWERS
Eddy: Now this is more like it! Serve me the answers pipin' hot baby! None of that revision bull for me, no-sir-ee!
EDD : Actually Eddy, this site offers Tutorials,
tips and advice on GCSE English, Mathematics, Sciences
and Modern Languages, not the answers as such.
EDDY: Bit of a mis-print then, innit? There was me thinking I
could jib studying all together!!Easy Start Algebra
Edd:Award winning tutorials, tips, and advice on algebra.
MY, how intruiging can algebra get! It's very psychological
too, y'know! It exercises your problem solving skills! I could
literally do algebra all day!
EDDY: Ed, are you bored...cos i'm ready to bust an artery
over here!
ED:I'm problem solving, Eddy!
The Last Minute! Software Company
EDD:ReviseNOW is a software study aid to help prepare for the GCSE.
EDDY: Perfect for us renegade masters who are too busy being gorgeous to revise!
EDD: Why must you promote lethargic learning, Eddy!I mean, talk about tactless anarchy!
EDDY:...Um...I can't, I dunno what it means!
UpMyStreet!
EDDY: Oh yeah, bout time we got off the boring school stuff, sockhead!
EDD: This website provides all the facts about live
in England and Wales, including property prices,
top GCSE and A-Level schools, Council Tax rates,
crime clear-up rates and ambulance response times....interesting!
EDDY:...I hate my life.
Seek a Japanese Pen Pal
Edd:This is an E-mail pen pal forum that specializes in contacts
between native Japanese and English speakers who wish
to engage in both language and cultural exchanges
-well worth a visit!
CNN ON-Line
Edd:Wherever possible I always promote education and current affairs, and such a page as this would go unjustified without a link to the most extensive news channel in the world-click and learn!
Eddy: You're a riot, Double Dee!
Jane Austen Society Of North America
Edd: Without a doubt one of the most remarkable authors the world has ever encountered, Jane Austen wrote novels such as "Pride And Prejudice" and "Emma" (Gwyneth Paltrow starred in a movie version not so long ago...((sigh)) ) loaded with sarcasm and satirical wit at the expense of her fellow 18th Century upper-class. Entertaining and poignant, here one will find Austen's stories, bio and lots more interesting information. Personally, I find myself deeply enamoured with Elizabeth Bennet from P.A.P,she has such a command of situation!
Eddy: Um...can somebody translate?
Ed:Would you like milk with that?
Ant Farm Central
Edd: Oh happy Day! Ants never cease to enthrall me, and this website is by no means an exception. Crawl through this collection of various types of ant farms and kits, perfect for any budding ant farmer!
Infinite Energy Magazine On-Line
Edd: Rapture! An online cold fusion information resource, and home of Infinite Energy Magazine, focusing on new developments in the field of chemically assisted nuclear reactions!
Eddy: Looks like you've got competition, Ed!
Ed: I am a nucleus! Hug Me!
You're A Good Man, Charlie Brown-Official Site
Edd-Official site about the Broadway Musical featuring everyone's favorite toon beagle, Snoopy and his owner Charlie Brown. Oh Brother!
Ed: Sarah bad for Ed!
Words Can Change the World
Edd:And this masterpiece of a website is no exception. Browse some heartfelt poetry and literature here and wallow in the sentiment-Bliss!
Enough of the Casablanca stuff, Romeo, but yeah, this site ROCKS! It's even got its own Fate Seeker-kinda like an on-line magic 8 ball-you ask it yes/no questions and it answers ya faster than you can say "Christina Aguilera's Bra" and believe me guys, I can say that pretty fast...he-he-he-he!!
Simply The Best-Sticky Notes!
Edd-Stick 'em, fold 'em, send 'em, lend 'em-sticky notes truly are a lifesaver and this website allows you to download software to create hundreds of different electronic stickynotes!
Chartered Institute of Environmental Health
The homepage of the barracks of ever-alert soldiers against the scourge of bacteria-patriotic, isn't it?
Worth and Worth Hat Shop
EDD:The hat...an age-old invention and the companion of bad-hair day sufferers everywhere. This New York City-based shop offers a variety of felt, straw and fur hats. Shop for a specific brand or style, such as a Montecristi Panama.
Eddy: You're kidding, right?
Virtual Magnifying Glass
Edd:Have you ever been frustrated when viewing World Wide Web .gif images on a page and wish you could see more? Really look into what's deep in the photograph, peel away the layers just like you were in the darkroom making an enlargement.
Now you can!
This page will take you to historical photographs from the UC/Riverside California Museum of Photography's collection. Unlike most WWW images, areas of these photographs are mapped to reveal new details not visible in the small in-line image. Dig deep, you will be surprised at what you might find among signs in shop windows, or down the dusty streets of a frontier town, at Disneyland in 1956, or in the Netherlands 90 years ago.
Eddy: You need to get out more, Edd. But then, I know of a few instances where a virtual magnifying glass'll come in handy-hehehehehe!!!!
The Entire Shakespeare Works On-Line
Edd-My links page wouldn't be complete without a dedication to the greatest bard the world has ever known!
ED: I'm a bard!
EDDY: You're a fencepost!
EDD: this is a good one because it includes a plot synopsis for the more popular plays as well as full texts and some interesting comprehension questions on the plays as well.
EDDY:Well I'M heading own there pronto...not!
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